Learning Dance - A Very Humbling Experience

I am not a professional dancer… never would be…. Over the last approximately six & a half years I have been attending part time dance classes just as a hobby… I had invested four & a half years learning salsa, around 11 months with an intention to get the basic knowledge of ballet & jazz, currently I am learning contemporary for the past 8 months & regularly on the lookout for more dance classes which I could join …..

I am no expert in dance….as a matter of fact my knowledge would be equivalent to a drop in an ocean. But I have had the good fortune of observing quite a few instructors either by attending their classes… or observing their classes or interacting with some of them without ever being part of their classes… the dance forms which these instructors taught varied across Salsa, Bachata, Zouk, Hip Hop, Ballet, Jazz, Swing, Waltz, Contemporary…. I hope I did not miss out anything……

Although I have only pursued dance as a hobby… I read about it a lot… through books, interviews, dance related blog sites, my friends posting blogs about dance, news that gets published on the net for major dance competitions and any other informative material on which I can get my hands on…. The thought of writing this blog post came to me because I wanted to pen down not my experience with dance but rather the experience which dance has given me over the past 6 years. I am in no way even near to completing my journey in dancing I would want to continue as long as I can………

Now that we have the context clear…… If I think back over the past 6.5 years I have learned from different instructors…. There have been instructors who have told me to not intervene at all in their choreography or method of teaching and just follow what they are asking everyone to do… and on the other end of the spectrum there have been instructors who have told me that they will just give me movements, how I piece them together or how I mould them is up to me, as per them choreographing a dance is putting a lid on the creativity of the students……. I have had instructors whose motivational speech before a performance was focused on how as a group we should go out there & prove to all other dance schools that we are better than them, annihilate the competition etc etc….. at the same time there have been instructors who before a performance have asked us to go out there enjoy ourselves & be proud of what we are doing…… if I am asked a question what is right & what is wrong… I don’t want to arrive at an answer or a conclusion because as per me very few instances in this world can be categorized as absolutely right or wrong there are just opinions & there is no right or wrong opinions as they are opinions and not judgments’… Judgments can be absolutely right or wrong not opinions……

I sincerely feel an urge to quote an incident here… at one point of time around 5 years back I asked one of my instructors as to why he never approaches or interacts much or attend any workshops of any other instructors… his reply was “Either they (the other instructors) do stuff which I don’t like and whatever else they do I can do it easier & better”….. I left the conversation there at that point... but after a year or so when I began to realize the potential joy & expansiveness dance brings to a person…. All that I could do was feel grieved about how this person has closed doors to a sea of knowledge which he could have embraced and expanded himself…. But again I don’t say he was right or wrong… that was his opinion this is mine……..

Now about my journey with dance & how it has changed me & still continues to change me every day & with every additional class I attend….. Learning dance has been a very humbling experience for me…. It has made me more aware of myself by immersing myself in movements & losing myself…. Whenever today in a class I try to jump higher and open my arms… I feel like I am embracing the world… gathering more from the world by opening my arms wider, jumping higher & holding my center to remain suspended in the air for a fraction of second longer so that I can gather more……. Dancing has introduced a very calm feeling around me….. dance is like a friend which will never disappoint you or leave you or ditch you or put you down. Dance is like the friend to whom you can convey any emotion which you want to convey joy, grief, laughter, anger and any other emotion….. dance is like a friend who will come & tell you everything; a dance can be sad, joyous, filled with grief, seething with anger….. dance is like a friend who will give you the best moments & never asking anything in return……

Dance is something which can make you so tired that if you are suffering from insomnia then you can fall asleep like a baby or can give you that extra shot of adrenaline if you want to stay awake for a long time…… For me dance has made me calm as a person & it has introduced calmness around me, it has given me the venting space for my creativity… creating movement to music, conveying the message without ever exercising your vocal chords purely through movements & expressions, trying to jump that extra few inches higher, trying to get a movement to look & feel good for yourself, suffering from  niggling pains in different part of the body during the entire day just because you pushed yourself a little harder, stretched a bit more, put in a little extra then your body would allow you….. can give you a high which no other drug can…. It is an addiction & mostly a healthy one……

As it stands today dance is an integral part of my existence…. It a part of my soul which cannot be separated….. it has given me so much that I already have given up hope of ever paying it back in any way or form…… now if I look back & imagine what I would have missed out had I not stepped in the studio for my first ever dance class 6 years back.. the thought is scary enough to make me not think of it any further…….

Today my determination is firm to continue to learn dance for as long as I can….. thanks ‘Dance’ for everything…. I would have been so incomplete without you……. I know you would never leave me & I hope I also would never let you go……..

Irony of a Standup Comedian

I very regularly visit plays, musicals, stand up acts & other similar events… I like them a lot more than either serials on television or any movies playing in the theatres… I find these events to be a more creative, challenging to pull off, closer to reality & definitely more entertaining…….

Anyone who has been on stage performing for an audience would agree when I say this that an artist does not need to finish his part go backstage & then analyze or ask someone as to how the performance was or what was the audience reaction… within a minute an artist is on stage he can immediately know whether the energy is getting channeled back from the audience to him or not…. The reaction need not always be laughter but would be the similarity in emotion which the artist is trying to convey through his or her work… if the artist is performing comedy… the emotion channeled back from the audience would be laughter & joy… if the artist is trying to convey grief… the emotion channeled back from the audience would be grief felt by the audience…… anger for anger.. sympathy for sympathy & so on… this channeling & live exchange of energy & emotion starts within the first few minutes an artist is on stage……

Last month I attended a standup comedy night, the show featured four artists each having a solo act of around 30 to 35 Minutes with the total duration of appx two & a quarter hours….. the act of first artist was a big success the entire audience laughed their socks off……….. the main thought of this post came to me from the act of the second artist… since I visit these events frequently I was aware that the artist performing the second act is a full time actor but not a full time stand up comedian & obviously majority of the audience did not had this information… and not being a full time comedian led to his act being very less impactful and hilarious then the artist which preceded him or succeeded him… the audience was barely reacting….the laughter from the earlier act had now transformed into chuckles…. That too was not very frequent….. I would still commend the artist because he gave his 100% throughout… he finished his act & was sent off with a courtesy warm applause… the two acts which followed his again picked up the tempo to end the evening on a high….

On my way back this got me thinking as to how difficult it would be for the artist to go through this experience…… he would have known how his act would go within minutes of him being up there on the stage trying to interact with the audience… trying to initiate the energy exchange channel of the same type of energy which he was making a sincere attempt to pass to the audience….the impact of the situation gets compounded because he is doing a stand up comedy act… he is suppose to look joyous… funny…. Hilarious…. Happy… contend with himself….. although every second he is spending on stage is draining so much out of him because he is passing energy to 450 people sitting in the audience but barely getting anything back to refill himself to continue…… even once his act was over & he would have been sitting backstage, then also no one would need to tell him that his act was not as effective as others Stage is a live X Ray machine.. the results are there live for everyone including the patient to see.. the printed report later is just a document conveying the same thing not of much use other then placing it in a file……

A lot changed for me after that evening… my respect & appreciation for that artist increased a million times… infact for all the artists who either have an off day or a show which does not go as they wanted it to… or all the artists who have not yet mastered the art of engaging the audience every time they are on stage… but still having the courage to perform on the satge…... willing to go out there and fight the silent battle in which you as an artist know the result within the first few minutes…. but you still carry on fighting either for your fellow soldiers who are the other actors on stage or for your king which is the audience watching you…………..

Rafael Nadal once after losing to Roger Federer in one of the grand slams said, “One needs to face defeats to value their victories”… for all the artists who have experienced this or are experiencing this… a big round of applause & appreciation from me for continuing the fight……. Warriors who assume legendary status are not those who always were on the winning side…. but those who gave it their all at the time of battle……..

Contradiction of Expression-Intention-Interpretation

We all have experienced how difficult it could be to shop for the opposite sex - the purpose does not simplify the problem - it could be a gift, could be just something good you saw for someone…. practically any reason, As far as I have seen the problem exists for both sexes while trying to accomplish this feat. The problem gets compounded if you actually care for the person you are buying & care as to how his/her reaction would be once she/he gets hold of it. Taking my example itself… I shop a lot (I am on the verge of becoming an obsessive compulsive shopaholic) however whenever I shop I keep an eye out for stuff for my sister & although luckily she has been mighty impressed by the stuff which I have ever bought for her & has more confidence on my taste than I have..... yet I am always nervous when I buy for her & that is the reason why I restrict my shopping to hand bags, clutches, footwear, jewellery & other accessories but any kind of garment is a strict no- no the simple reason being the number of risk factors which can go wrong are way too high… the cut of the dress, the fall, the length, the size, the color, the fitting etc etc etc… too risky a proposition for me to undertake.

The incident which prompts me to write this is what I came across during my recent trip to London for around a week. I was shopping at a Burberry Outlet & was just going about my business of shopping for blazers when a female of Japanese origin aged about 25 – 30 came up to me & very politely asked me that what do I think of the trench coat for man she was holding in her hand, I looked at it & genuinely said it looks good. Then she explained that she was looking to buy something for her boyfriend & I resemble him as far as body shape, height etc are concerned & if I could just wear the coat & confirm to her if the size is ok & she wanted to see how it looks on me to get an idea of how it would look on her boyfriend…. I gladly obliged, did a bit of modeling for her… handed the coat back to her she said thanks & then went towards the billing counter. Almost exactly the same incident happen with me the next day when I was at Oxford Street again shopping at Harvey Nichols, the only difference was that the lady was of British Origin, same age group & this time the garment was a sweat shirt….

My total stay in London was 5 days & similar incident occurring twice got me thinking…. The thought was why don’t I do this when I am shopping for someone or see others doing it often in India…. & 2 incidents straight away come to my mind first was at Garuda Mall in Bangalore & second one was at Palladium Shopping Mall in Mumbai… both time I saw two girls at each of these places completely perplexed & confused as to what size would fit the guy for which they were  buying in the first case it was a shirt & in the latter case it was a blazer… both times I observed the discussion between the two of them continued for more than half an hour without any consensus or outcome… which is obvious since the information to generate outcome was itself missing…… reading the above, the solution seems very simple… they could have looked around for a guy who had the same physical resemblance requested him to try & could have made a decision… come to think of it they could have asked one of the stores salesman to do the same for them… but I have never seen this happening……

Post my return from London I met one of my friends & asked her for her opinion as to why in our country people do not ask for this kind of assistance from either fellow shoppers at the store or sales staff itself….. her immediate response was it would be interpreted as if the guy is asking a girl, he is making a pass at her & if the situation is other way around the girl is making a pass at the guy…… My logical sense went into a frenzy I explained to her that lets take a step back & think about it… if a girl is asking a guy to try something & giving him the background information that she wants to buy something for another guy… unless she explicitly mentions that it is for her brother or cousin or relative hasn’t she already eliminated any chance of her even being remotely interested in making a pass at you….. it is like someone walking up to you & saying “Hi! I just got a minus twelve in my IQ test would you like to discuss Quantum Physics with me?”… & the same logic would hold good for a guy asking help from a girl… but it does not happen… at least not very often……

On introspection I would also not do this if I am shopping in India...I am too scared since I also believe it will be interpreted the same way which my friend explained…. in London or US perhaps yes I will after the experiences which I have had. But that brings me to the question which is still unanswered… that is actually has our societal values, the environment in which we are bought up holds such a vice grip on certain behavioral patterns of our life that logic & rationale take a back seat… perhaps yes…. I feel really great when the I see young & even younger generations liberating themselves from such vice grips in various dimensions but at the same I get worried when I see ‘liberation’ being used & exercised way too ‘liberally’….. but again liberation is not a measuring scale & there is no optimum level of liberation… the pendulum will keep swinging on either side of the spectrum….. however a pendulum swinging is anyday better then remaining stationary & gathering dust…..